Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
