The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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