There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
