Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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