Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
