I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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