I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Just high enough for therapy.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
