just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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