I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Randomize
