I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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