ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
operation harelip BJ is a go
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Randomize