Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
