Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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