ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
