so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
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