Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
