Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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