Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
