You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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