I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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