You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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