and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
