The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
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