How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
