I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
