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It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Randomize
