Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
