Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize
