I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
