I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize