Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
vagina is talking i cant
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
