i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
