I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Randomize
