I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
