Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
