Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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