You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
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