Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
