Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
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