There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
