didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
