he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
