you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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