Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
