Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize