the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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