Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
