Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
