My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
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