Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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